Another year over
It's also fairly normal for me to look ahead to the turning of the year and groan. Like birthdays and anniversaries, these calendar milestones just put me in a mood about where everything is and how I never seem to be satisfied. This year, ironically, I'm not feeling as pessimistic as I normally do. When I do go back to work next week, I know that it'll be about 6 weeks remaining before I get the hell out of that project, which ain't too bad. I'm booked to go skiing with the guys in March. I have a few interviews lined up for January... so there are things to look forward to.
Will 2006 prove to be a better year than 2005? Obviously, this is something that cannot be answered right now. What I can say is that the perception of a year as "good" or "bad" becomes more and more vague as time goes by. I guess it's because life becomes more complicated. At 19, it's all about studies, girls and the future - the risk-reward framework, social networks and the economics are fairly manageable. At 29, there are so many conflicting concerns, so many things falling into the mix - things like tax, career prospects, pressure to get married and settle down, work-life balance, the need to do something worthy, and the sense that time to fulfil one's dreams is continually draining away. It's important, however, that you don't let that stop you from still reaching for it - you have to keep reaching for it, otherwise we'd all end up suiciding eventually.