Weary and lost for words...
Forgive me in advance for poor prose.
I tried writing about the London incidents since last Thursday, but failed. There aren't words to describe how I feel about it, and that is not to suggest I am seized by an extremity of feeling. Moral indignation doesn't say it all, apathy is unthinkable as well as unforgiveable and, as the website has stated - I am not afraid. It has emerged that the suicide bombers were home grown - British born - and yet the great multicultural project (of which my immigrant stock is part) has unearthed a horrible failing. We shall see how society responds - I for my part have no idea what is next.
In other news...
Work is a sink, swallowing up my enthusiasm and drive as my boss proceeds to throw away every opportunity for progress that I can unearth. Prospects are bleak again - and avoidably so. It doesn't bear thinking what happens next, although my return to the zone of corporate employment doesn't seem so ugly at present - at least things get done in that part of the world.
I'm weighing up an approach to a girl who works on my floor - fetching she is, but always looks so serious, impassive and inaccessible. It feels as though humour would be stonewalled, and intrigue banished, that any overture would not be shouldered lightly, and any attempt at charm would be burnt whole. It's not that I'm faint hearted or anything, I'm just not sure if I can be bothered to make the effort - or, "lazy makes lonely", as my friend likes to say.
I'm looking forward to my vacation time coming up - out to Bratislava for a huge piss-up stag weekend on the 22nd, and hopefully a week in New York in early August. Time out of this crazy hole, the prospect of wallowing in my long-held fantasies of being an American. Don't ask me why - it's not just a TV dream, I've always just wanted it.
and finally...
I hope everyone out there is getting good sleep. Quality sleep is becoming a theme of my musings these days. I woke up yesterday an hour after my alarm clock gave up a yell, and I felt like lead - nothing wanted to move, each muscle screaming out: "leave me the fuck alone! I'm not done yet! learn to sleep properly, punk-ass bitch!"
I tried writing about the London incidents since last Thursday, but failed. There aren't words to describe how I feel about it, and that is not to suggest I am seized by an extremity of feeling. Moral indignation doesn't say it all, apathy is unthinkable as well as unforgiveable and, as the website has stated - I am not afraid. It has emerged that the suicide bombers were home grown - British born - and yet the great multicultural project (of which my immigrant stock is part) has unearthed a horrible failing. We shall see how society responds - I for my part have no idea what is next.
In other news...
Work is a sink, swallowing up my enthusiasm and drive as my boss proceeds to throw away every opportunity for progress that I can unearth. Prospects are bleak again - and avoidably so. It doesn't bear thinking what happens next, although my return to the zone of corporate employment doesn't seem so ugly at present - at least things get done in that part of the world.
I'm weighing up an approach to a girl who works on my floor - fetching she is, but always looks so serious, impassive and inaccessible. It feels as though humour would be stonewalled, and intrigue banished, that any overture would not be shouldered lightly, and any attempt at charm would be burnt whole. It's not that I'm faint hearted or anything, I'm just not sure if I can be bothered to make the effort - or, "lazy makes lonely", as my friend likes to say.
I'm looking forward to my vacation time coming up - out to Bratislava for a huge piss-up stag weekend on the 22nd, and hopefully a week in New York in early August. Time out of this crazy hole, the prospect of wallowing in my long-held fantasies of being an American. Don't ask me why - it's not just a TV dream, I've always just wanted it.
and finally...
I hope everyone out there is getting good sleep. Quality sleep is becoming a theme of my musings these days. I woke up yesterday an hour after my alarm clock gave up a yell, and I felt like lead - nothing wanted to move, each muscle screaming out: "leave me the fuck alone! I'm not done yet! learn to sleep properly, punk-ass bitch!"
posted by nickwong8 at 9:17 pm
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