Talent over competence

Last night was spent considering the disappointment of my twenties. I'm turning twenty-nine later this year, I'm feeling completely underwhelmed by my meagre achievements and manifold shortcomings in what I've embarked upon. This is not intended to be a weary, negative litany on the dampening of youth. I'm hoping, through the practice of reflection, to extract the defining lesson of the past decade - and I'm hoping I get there before I hit thirty so I can take the learning and de better! At the moment, the question is one of talent. I used to believe that I had some, not a huge amount, but enough to develop. What I am beginning to realise is that what I have is not talent, but competence. The difference between the two? Talent is essential, in that it can be conceptualised into an indivisible abstract. Competence, on the other hand, is simply a mechanical ability to do other things - a universal cog. Competence is machinal, the crank and handle. Talent is the phenomenon that enables the machine to animate. Ok, so this analogy is a rough one, but it serves to make a point. I work best as a conduit for talent: I am an artisan, but not talented in myself. I'm not sure if this makes me less worthy or not (I hope not!), but it's worth the self-examination...

My first sculpture class in on Tuesday - something to look forward to, something far removed from the drudgery of day-to-day employment. It's also an opportunity for me to observe the class and see how talent and competence interact, as I'm pretty sure the other members of class will demonstrate varying examples of both.